Everything On MR PORTER I’d Actually Buy (If I Had The Money)

everything on MR PORTER to buy if we had the money

Consider this a robust ‘thought experiment.’

Or, more accurately, “Brock told me to make a wishlist on MR PORTER for my birthday, and here’s everything on it.” Two in the same.

And while we’re on the topic of money we don’t have, who said anything about saving up for a wedding in April, 2020? The most expensive dinner we’ll have ever hosted for 140-ish people… That can wait. It’s my birthday on Thursday.

For starters, this green suede trucker jacket from Todd Snyder would do wonders for my *first* Fall wardrobe in NYC.

And don’t even get me started on these mesh + neoprene sneakers by Moncler. Which (sure… call me CRAZY) would only look better paired with this color-blocked vest by Aimé Leon Dore. Very ‘Power Rangers chic’ in the way my God, Fashion, intended.

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I don’t skateboard. Tried it once. Skinnned my knees. Never again. But, if we’re talking about art, I’d absolutely love this Set of Four Printed Wooden Skateboards by The SkateRoom, decorated with a vibrant print of Keith Haring’s 1986 ‘Crack is Wack.’

I’d also love this matching printed cotton pajama set in a tiger print by Desmond & Dempsey.

Which, if we’re talking about being comfy, I’m probably already on the couch, watching the latest season of Killing Eve, eating Chinese takeout or Thai, and 1,000,000% needing new glasses. So, these would do perfectly for such a situation: a pair of gold square-frame glasses by Gucci.

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But, wait, I’m not done… my thought experiment continues.

When talking about more things I can’t afford, we mustn’t forget accessories and bags. This beaded polished sterling silver and 18-karat gold bracelet by Le Gramme will do just fine. For bags, I’d be fine with either this navy blue leather tote by Saint Laurent or this charcoal pebble-grain leather-trimmed mélange twill tote bag by Thom Browne.

And lastly, we arrive at the finale of this lesson in imagination:

What MR PORTER can’t give me is a spontaneous trip to somewhere tropical. But! If within the realms of possibility and improbability I was somehow whisked away to, say, Bermuda (never been, would LOVE to go), I’d love to be dressed in the following:

this navy camp-collar cotton shirt by Bottega Veneta;
this pair of off-white stretch cotton and silk twill trousers by Ermenegildo Zegna;
and this pair of navy suede espadrilles by Castañer.

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And just like that, my MR PORTER birthday dreams are done 🙂

(I’ll let you in on a secret, though… given the state of our wedding budget, I’ve actually asked Brock to notget me anything. Except for a thoughtful birthday card. How practical!)

Love you all 🙂

<3 Chris

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